Ten Fun Ways to Look Like an Idiot*
* Or avoiding blackjack protocol at all costs!
by Michael Dalton
(Originally published in the Summer 1996 issue of Blackjack Review)
- Before you sit down at any table be sure to introduce yourself and shake the dealer’s hand. If you need chips, always hand the dealer the money directly. Never place money directly on the table… someone might steal it!
- Be sure to have a cup full of slot tokens in your lap and preferably on the table. They are great for tipping and when you pile them up in your betting circle you will feel like a high roller.
- Always pick up your cards with two hands. You don’t want to drop them do you?
- Tell the dealer you would like to take insurance when he “doesn’t” have an Ace up. Oh, let’s say, with an 8 up, for example.
- When playing your hand, always signal your wishes verbally instead of using that silly scratching technique.
- In a face down game, don’t tell anyone if you get a blackjack. Just keep it a secret until the dealer flips it over… for all to enjoy!
- When doubling down, just slap your chips on top of your main bet. It’s so much more fun doing it this way and it adds a bit of excitement to the game. When security comes just tell them you heard about it in Blackjack Review.. they’ll understand!
- In a face down game when the count is negative… and you have busted your hand, just keep asking for cards until you get 31. Just tell them you thought this was Chinese blackjack.
- Every now and then bet less than the table minimum. This keeps the dealer and pit on their toes and tells them you are someone to be reckoned with!
- If another player makes a mistake… any mistake, ask the dealer for your money back!